Sorry about that last post, loves. I just needed to do something to level myself out.
So I carved an operator symbol onto my chest using the knife of the man who killed me. I incorporated the scar from the stab wound into the design.
Also made some cuts on my arms and legs, then took some of my sewing needles, threaded them and shoved them under my skin… Made a pretty stitch pattern
When I was done, I lay on the floor looking up at Ritter for a while. He seemed pleased with this little display. I asked him if he would ever let me leave here. He still won’t answer that one.
It’s alright… You know, I’m not even angry at him for doing this to me. He’s just acting according to his nature. I don’t think of him as a monster any more than I would a shark if it bit me. Yeah… the way I figure it, people like me are the real monsters. We know what the human condition is yet we go on hurting others, enjoying it. I don’t think he knows, or if he does, then it’s in the same way that a scientist might know the experiences of a lab animal but continues testing because of the benefits. I can’t judge him according to any human concept of morality because, like a lab animal looking at the scientist, he is beyond my understanding.
I’m not sure where I was going with that… Just some rambling thoughts to keep my mind occupied. I’m still starving but overall I do feel much better since I did that bit of cutting... Been a while since I’ve done that… it felt almost nostalgic
Oh, and because I wasn’t in the proper frame of mind to say this before, merry Christmas and happy new year.
Heh... I suppose I should be grateful to Ritter… At least I wasn’t alone on Christmas hahaha
If I’m still alive next winter, I am totally going to knit him a festive sweater