Thursday, November 24, 2011

The promised follow up

to the last post…  Aside from the time spent catching up with a few of you and trying to remember more of what happened and why, I’ve mostly been sleeping… Exciting, I know, but I needed the time to recuperate and it doesn’t help matters that Ritter’s song is still inmyhead… Makes it difficult to wake up, concentrate or motivate myself to do anything… Though I seem to be getting used to it to some degree… not sure if that’s a good thing  

Been dreaming of frightened faces, vague memories of struggling bodies… nothing clear though  
There is one thing.... I’m pretty damn certain that a good portion of my victims were not on the Island…  I guess that’s obvious by the fact that there would probably be news reports about a rash of disappearances or deaths in the area if they had been (and I certainly haven’t seen any) but I figured I might as well state that anyway… Might be important in case Ritter decides to play more of those memory games he’s so fond of...
Speaking of which, I suppose you’re wondering about those two terribly cryptic posts that I apparently made…  So am I as I don’t recall making them

Ugh… Whatever mental state I was in at the time, I wish I could have been more creative then to leave stereotypical proxy mystery posts… My face has been thoroughly palmed
I suppose it could have been worse though… it could have been one of those propaganda posts or been encoded in binary    

On that note, I noticed the comment that I left on OPOF’s blog… I apologize if that came off as rude Bittersweet... I was not myself, to say the least and I wish you luck
If I was rude to anyone else, I apologize to you as well

Embarrassment aside, I suppose I should address the contents of those posts… The first seems like a straight forward reference to the Red Riding Hood story and my bloody work for Ritter.

The second one is… interesting…
For one thing, that image reminds me of what I remember seeing in Ritter’s realm… though it could just be like a Rorschach test effect, where everyone sees something different…  
For another, I seem to have been referencing fairy tales again, but a different one this time… The line about the powdered paw makes me think of The Wolf and Seven Young Kids… If that’s the case then the line seems to be about deception, but of whom? Penelope? Maybe… but it seems odd that I would be referring to her at that point… Though I guess I can’t really count anything as “odd” anymore. The line about voices and ending stories seems to be a further reference to the murders as well as to Ritter’ssong

Why I made those posts, I don’t know… It might even be too much of an assumption to say that I made them, as if that were certain… Honestly, I don’t even know if the few memories I have of the time I was gone are accurate… My wounds and the dried blood tell me that at least some are, but I don’t know…  

I must also continue to wonder at why I was taken… It's possible that Ritter just wanted some work done... that seems like the simplest answer but then why mess with my mind in such a way?

Perhaps it was a test... Maybe a test of my endurance or skills or... loyalty? Maybe he wanted to know whether I’m as willing to die to accomplish what he wants as I was for what I wanted... Also, I suspect  that I would not be alive right now if I had failed to kill that man... If that was the case, then he certainly got his answer, though I'd have thought that he would know already. When I accept responsibility for a task I will see it through regardless of the cost to myself. 

It could also have been a threat... The time in Ritter's realm, being made tolosemyself would lend itself to that idea. It should be obvious that I still fear that... but it's not a new fear.. I took it as a possible job hazard all along…  Also, I can’t think of anything I’ve done that would piss him off or otherwise warrant threats or punishment... On that note, I wonder if the loss of self was even intentional. It's possible it could have simply been a side effect of being in his realm 

Heh… Maybe this was all just a game for his amusement. If so, then I hope I put on a decent show for him at least  

Anyway, this is getting long and I think I'm starting to ramble so I’ll end here… 
Sorry about the lack of answers... 
What can I say? I just work for the guy. 
If any of you have your own thoughts about my little situation, please feel free to share. 

I’ll try to force myself to explore the area soon and I’ll let you know when I figure out where I am.

No comments:

Post a Comment