Penelope

Changed my profile picture again… You can see it over there on the right. I figured it would be appropriate for the subject of this post. This is the one I used when Penelope started talking to me.

Poor Penelope, the girl of OPOF’s dreams…

Before I continue, I want to make one thing clear. This is not an attempt to justify my decisions. I am not looking for sympathy or absolution. As I said in my initial post here, I’m doing this for my own benefit in case I lose myself. I’m just trying to write this in such a way that others can follow if they so choose.

Penelope crossed my path at a very… awkward time in my life, lured in by the innocent appearance of my work.

By this point there was a war raging inside my head. The dark part of myself, enticed by the aforementioned game and the possibility of taking action was growing stronger, yet kept directionless by feelings of depression, guilt, confusion and pain. I think Slendy picked up on this, as well as my growing addiction to OPOF, because he started to appear more frequently and more aggressively. I’m fairly certain he knew what was in my heart before I truly did…

During that period of inner chaos and while OPOF was dreaming, Penelope turned up on my knitting blog and without knowing it, was promptly ensnared. She was so sweet and kind and eager to do me a favor that I held off on telling OPOF about her and gave her warnings. I played the part of a friend, making suggestions and wishing her comfort while doing things in plain sight and behind her back that put her in danger. I’m surprised that she didn’t pick up on it, actually.

She begged me not to tell OPOF about her, absolutely begged me. This would, under normal circumstances be an advisable move. Unfortunately for her, at that point it was just about the worst thing she could have done. This plea for mercy in the midst of all the pain that I was feeling was offensive to me. My directionless anger suddenly had somewhere to go, even as my lighter side screamed for me to stop. I publicly followed her blog, so that OPOF could more easily find her through me, I hinted that she should look at my responses to his posts to see what kind of person I was, and I dropped a hint or two when talking to OPOF as well. Hell, even my name is a warning in itself. Knit Wolf indicates something dangerous hidden in something cute. She didn’t seem to pick up on any of it. I don’t think she even took the hint to watch his blog or my responses either.

Things reached the breaking point when OPOF mentioned his second dream about her. Upon hearing this, I began to wonder how much time she had left if Slendy was that close. Part of me said I should stay quiet and see what happens, another part of me said I should send OPOF after her for the sadistic entertainment value of what might happen if he and Slendy met and started to fight over her and yet another part of me said to send him after her in hopes of a swifter demise, or at least one at the hands of a human. Despite all of this, I did keep my word. I did not mention her to OPOF until after he found his way to her apartment. I merely told him to follow me and he did.

This might have been the end of sweet Penelope, but I gave her one last warning as repayment for her kindness and this time she actually took the damn advice and fled. Though why she thought it would be a good idea to leave her cat, I’ll never know. Anyway, that act of fairness was one of the last cries of my lighter side before it died. It could very well have been my undoing.

This post is getting pretty long, but before I end it I should probably answer the question that I can practically hear OPOF asking: what was I going on about in saying that Slendy was giving me little choice and that I had hoped he would be satisfied with my work alone etc?

Well… these were select truths that I arranged to be just cryptic enough to get you to follow and just honest enough to get her to run. I really was sleep deprived, Slendy being so close did get me to feel like I had limited time, therefore limited choice, I was hoping he was satisfied by my work in that I was starting to want to work with him and it was out of a sense of fairness that the warning was given.

Sorry for the run-around OPOF but perhaps you’ll be satisfied in knowing that I was punished for it. Maybe I’ll tell you what happened later.

Hmm this has been a dark post, so how about some cheery music to lighten the mood?